How to be a Better Top

Workout tips: Five ways to become a bottom’s dream lover

By: Dan Welden

No one likes a lazy top, but being a bottom’s dream lover takes a lot of work—and it exerts a lot of strain on some very specific muscles. Here are five ways you can improve your performance.

Firm up your glutes: Glute bridges will have you bucking like a bull in no time. To begin, lie on your back with knees bent, placing your hands flat on the ground next to your body. Lift your hips off the ground while pushing from your heels, keeping your back straight. When you’ve formed a 45-degree angle, you should look like a sideways triangle. Contract your glutes and hold for a second, then return to the starting position and repeat four to five sets until failure. If you find this exercise too easy, perform the movement while holding a barbell across your pelvis—or, if you really want to up the intensity, have someone positioned on your lap.

Stamina is key: Nothing is more frustrating than a lover who has to take a break to catch his breath in the middle of passionate lovemaking. Prevent this by integrating some intense cardio into your workouts. I recommend the rowing machine for a full-body cardio exercise, which is essential for the bedroom. Aim to do an intense session for 10 to 15 minutes, three to four times a week.

Strengthen your chest and triceps: You may not realize how important a strong chest and triceps are until you can no longer hold yourself up while thrusting. Save yourself that embarrassment by doing five sets of push-ups until failure three days a week, plus three days weekly of planks on your hands instead of your elbows. Hold your plank for at least a minute, repeating five times with a 30 to 60 second break between each set. I recommend asking a trainer to check your form to make sure you’re not sagging or arching.

Build up your back: It’s so hot to be lifted up mid-sex and moved into new positions. However, without a strong back the transition could be sloppy or a total flop. Pull-ups and bent-over barbell rows are great exercises to rectify this. Complete five sets of pull-ups until failure, keeping them slow and controlled; your goal should be to complete a minimum of 10 pull-ups each set. Bent-over barbell rows are also great for strengthening your entire back. I prefer to grab the barbell underhand, standing upright with a slight bend in the knees, then bend at the hips while keeping my back straight; you should end with your upper body parallel with the ground. Bring the barbell to your stomach while keeping your elbows to your sides instead of flared out. Return the bar to the starting position and repeat, completing four to five sets with 10 to 15 reps per set.

Be flexible: Do your stretches! The bottom can’t be the only flexible one or else you’re closing yourself off to a plethora of “untapped” positions. Consider yoga a few times a week to help with your Kama Sutra journey.